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Showing posts from 2018

Pre-coffee parenting

My least and most liked things in one scrawled swoop, more doodles  here. It's wondrous stuff isn't it, coffee? Small knows the rule in our house- don't talk to mum until she's on cup #2. Parenting goes wonderfully well until that glorious cup, along the lines of- don't eat that, look at those tiny pieces that will occupy your hamfists being fished out of the rug, Shhhh. YOU KNOW THE RULE KID. Made it to the seaside, ruminating the not-holiday of last year. She still doesn't get the whole wet sand / sinking child dichotomy, could have ended worse than it did. Naturally she was angry at times, I'd have been disappointed if I'd had to buy instead.   Small has awoken beautifully, after what was quite likely the loveliest playdate she's had recently. I was horrendously late naturally, after waging war with Ikea over botanical disasters (meaning that, in pure British fashion, I sent a passive aggressive tweet airing

You don't want to go out today? That's perfect, kiddo.

Note the (Clearly handed to me by reasonably more fashionable Mum) polo neck covering.... I am selfie ready, people. I did a parenting. Well, I say parenting.... more horrendously inappropriate and not-thought through decision making fest. Wine induced, obviously. And I'm paying for it now, literally and metaphorically. I'm taking Small to Disneyland Paris for Easter. Clearly thought this one through. Mum took me as a 6ish year old when pregnant with the Sibling as a surprise. Other than nostalgic memory lane-ing and a fuck ton of inflation, I presume it'll be the same.... pretty, princessy, cotton wool and squealing Angries that don't belong to you so you can't not-parent them (so, effectively that's just scowl at their mad face and revoke all teenage privileges in advance). I mean, it could have been worse. I couldn't book the Shit-but-great Turkish hotel from 2017 this far in advance.... and had fingerlust. -Alas, these days meaning nothin